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very odd situation occurred at a wedding i was at last weekend

there was a very strange little guy in the corner. he looked...
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Date: July 11th, 2022 8:42 PM
Author: floppy slap-happy school cafeteria

there was a very strange little guy in the corner. he looked maybe 5’2”, but then when i saw him closer i noticed he was wearing these giant “moon boots” (i don’t know what else to call them) with like 6 inch soles, so no way he was even five feet in his socks. anyway, he spent most of the reception in the corner hunched over his phone, typing like a maniac and then howling with laughter. most people tried to just ignore him.

when all the speeches and everything started he drew up to the crowd and stood next to me. i was struck by how beautiful his face was; basically like a garden gnome version of jared leto. he looked up and asked if this was “an emotional wedding.” i didn’t really understand what he meant, so just nodded to be polite and he did his crazy laugh again. then the bride and groom started the first dance and he totally lost it. later on everybody was trying to figure out what he meant by screaming “justice” as loud as he could while crying, but i was the closest to him and i would swear he was screaming “duchess,” even though that makes even less sense. he wouldn’t respond to anyone asking him to calm down or leave so one of the groomsmen simply picked him up from under his arms and carried him outside. i went outside later to smoke a cigarette and he was still there. he was sitting on the curb for about two minutes with me watching him and then, i shit you not, he somehow swung his tiny legs over a deer that had wandered by and rode off.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2#44834802)



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Date: July 11th, 2022 10:38 PM
Author: floppy slap-happy school cafeteria



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2#44835393)



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Date: July 11th, 2022 10:40 PM
Author: concupiscible puce theater stage pisswyrm



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2#44835407)



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Date: July 11th, 2022 10:41 PM
Author: Soul-stirring corner toaster



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2#44835413)



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Date: July 12th, 2022 12:15 AM
Author: floppy slap-happy school cafeteria



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2#44835797)



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Date: July 12th, 2022 8:13 PM
Author: floppy slap-happy school cafeteria



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2#44840314)



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Date: July 12th, 2022 8:17 PM
Author: hairraiser chapel



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2#44840325)



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Date: July 12th, 2022 8:21 PM
Author: Razzle aggressive parlor



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2#44840330)



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Date: July 29th, 2022 9:39 PM
Author: floppy slap-happy school cafeteria



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2#44936377)



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Date: July 29th, 2022 9:43 PM
Author: tripping cruise ship



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2#44936392)



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Date: July 29th, 2022 9:43 PM
Author: purple startled potus



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2#44936393)



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Date: July 29th, 2022 9:44 PM
Author: pungent salmon bawdyhouse corn cake



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2#44936396)



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Date: July 29th, 2022 9:50 PM
Author: Ruddy native



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2#44936409)



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Date: July 29th, 2022 10:09 PM
Author: Magical clown rehab



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2#44936490)



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Date: July 29th, 2022 10:20 PM
Author: pungent salmon bawdyhouse corn cake

https://i.pinimg.com/originals/64/1c/c2/641cc21bce452f97bf8102b6ea982b1d.jpg

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2#44936539)



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Date: September 2nd, 2022 2:37 PM
Author: floppy slap-happy school cafeteria



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2#45110563)



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Date: September 2nd, 2022 2:39 PM
Author: vibrant principal's office newt



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2#45110574)



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Date: September 2nd, 2022 2:40 PM
Author: insane school shitlib



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2#45110579)



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Date: September 2nd, 2022 2:41 PM
Author: Fear-inspiring theater



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2#45110585)



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Date: May 19th, 2023 11:14 AM
Author: floppy slap-happy school cafeteria



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2#46330823)



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Date: May 19th, 2023 11:17 AM
Author: ocher stimulating community account



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2#46330840)



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Date: December 23rd, 2024 1:12 AM
Author: floppy slap-happy school cafeteria



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2#48477480)



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Date: June 2nd, 2025 10:24 AM
Author: floppy slap-happy school cafeteria



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2#48980464)



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Date: June 15th, 2026 9:36 AM
Author: Robert Byrd Schitt



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2#49939868)