Not a joke.

I look at my visage in the mirror each morning and I mouth out the words, “I hate you. I fucking hate you. Die faggot, die! Die! Faggot! Die! Die! Die!”

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5538098&forum_id=2#47728570)

Have you bought any books or learned anything?

Have you made any purchases from legitimate dealers or auction houses?

Also note that buying a handful of coins isn't numismatics; it's buying a handful of coins. Numismatics is the scientific/archaeological/historical research side; the most rewarding, but not something you seem to have delved into in the least.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5538098&forum_id=2#47730966)

It has a chop mark in it

So I am trying, but I realized I don’t care anymore

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5538098&forum_id=2#47730978)

Are you able to read & interpret the legends?

Who made the chop mark?

Where did it circulate?

I guess I don't understand what you are "trying" to do. Are you just buying hunks of metal and expecting some extracorporeal experience from looking at them once?

Coins are just pieces of metal. Their meaning arises from their context (and pursuit of discovering that context), not from route acquisition.

What you're doing sounds like someone who buys a bunch of books and never opens a single one, then complains that they have a bunch of dumb books lying around the house.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5538098&forum_id=2#47730987)